Kenny Stills spent years as the public face of a movement that challenged America to confront uncomfortable truths about police brutality and systemic injustice. The former NFL wide receiver knelt alongside Colin Kaepernick, risking his career and livelihood to demand change. But while cameras captured his protests on the field, they missed the quieter battle he was fighting within himself.
His new memoir Still Growing, Still Learning, Still Me, released January 6 through Edge of Sports, an imprint of Akashic Books, charts a journey that extends far beyond football stadiums and protest lines. The 264-page book offers an unflinching look at what activism costs those who dedicate themselves to social justice, and how Stills found a path toward healing that defied conventional expectations.
The price of taking a stand
Stills pulls back the curtain on the NFL’s reaction to the protests that made headlines across the country. The book details his public confrontation with Miami Dolphins owner Stephen Ross and the locker room politics that followed his decision to kneel. These weren’t abstract gestures but choices that carried real consequences for his career and relationships within the sport.
The activism extended beyond symbolic gestures during the national anthem. In 2020, Stills was arrested at the home of Kentucky’s Attorney General while demanding justice for Breonna Taylor, a Black woman killed by police in her own apartment. These moments of public resistance came with personal costs that the former receiver is now ready to discuss openly.
Redefining what strength means
The memoir moves beyond typical sports narratives to tackle something rarely discussed among professional athletes, especially Black men in high-profile positions. Stills describes his difficult transition from shedding the athlete identity to discovering the human being underneath. This process involved confronting the reality that the same strength required to compete at football’s highest level can become a barrier to emotional vulnerability and healing.
By opening up about therapy and his struggles with mental health, Stills offers what advocates are calling a new model of masculinity for the next generation. In a culture that often demands Black men sacrifice their bodies for entertainment and their minds for causes, he presents an alternative path that prioritizes wellness alongside activism.
The controversial path to healing
Perhaps the most unexpected element of Stills’ story involves his exploration of psychedelic therapy as a tool for mental health recovery and spiritual awakening. The book provides a candid examination of how alternative therapies played a crucial role in his healing journey, a topic that remains controversial despite growing research into psychedelics’ therapeutic potential.
Stills emphasizes that strength encompasses more than perseverance. It also requires self-awareness, healing and prioritizing wellbeing. He argues that activism, like life itself, can take a toll on the mind and spirit, making mental health care just as vital as taking political stands.
The empty cup theory
The memoir introduces what Stills calls the empty cup theory, reminding activists and changemakers that they cannot pour from an empty vessel. This perspective represents an evolution in how people think about social justice work, moving the conversation from fighting against oppressive systems to fighting for inner peace as a foundation for sustainable activism.
Dr. Rheeda Walker, author of The Unapologetic Guide to Black Mental Health, describes the book as a masterclass in truth-telling, transformation and courageous faith. The work serves as both personal narrative and cultural intervention, challenging readers to reconsider assumptions about strength, sacrifice and what it means to create lasting change.
More than a sports story
The University of Oklahoma standout and nine-year NFL veteran has shifted his focus from deep-threat playmaking to championing innovative wellness causes and grassroots community building. The memoir includes a 24-page full-color insert documenting his life from stadium lights to the frontlines of justice movements.
The hardcover retails for $29.95 and is available now through Akashic Books.
Source: Coyote Gnarles LLC / Akashic Books
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